she handed me a piece of paper and pointed to the figure at the bottom. $690. this doesn't include today's $190. teeth are really fucking expensive. no longer having pain is expensive. root canals are boring. and i'll probably fork out more for a crown, down the track, when my gutted tooth turns grey. i hear voices saying now's a good time to get 'dental cover'. but no. insurance is evil.
so now i'm just filling in time until i can eat. i'm swollen, yet hungry. i've not eaten today. it was a late night, a difficult sleep, an early morning, an indecisive wardrobe, a prolonged bus ride to uni, a lecture to attend with course readers to hand out, a coffee to group ourselves, a timesheet to fax, a dentist to visit. and then i'm here.
flirting with the idea of taking a sick day. flashbacks to being a kid, taking an afternoon out of school to visit the dentist. hating it, but feeling some compensation by being out-of-school, and the sometimes glimpse of daytime TV. then there was the drama of having a numb face - "can i have ice-cream?" - which doesn't really work in adult interactions. so i just perform this alone, through these words, and fantasies about being in bed with a DVD. because i'm so terribly uncomfortable. and so very brave.
fuck it. i'm going home.
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