the first few laps of the pool were awakening. my arms pushed forward, then down through the water, strenching along the length of my body. pursed lips push out air at a metered pace. unconsciously counting. my legs move up and down in a gentle sway. my head points downward, moving sideways every three strokes, to take in air. my body expands itself beyond itself.
towards the end of the swim i'm feeling my shoulders, as though heavy and water-logged. i'm hearing my breath. i'm slowing down, but ocassionally finding reserves of energy to push on. and i push on.
i sit in the steam room and my shoulders melt. my arms feel like they're no longer there. my lungs take in the heat. my pulse slows. sweat trickles down my chest, my face, my everything.
i walk back to the desk, some photocopying on the way, and the purchase of a sandwich. i feel upright, walking with ease, eyes meeting eyes. this feeling grants me departure from where i was this morning, when things seemed impossible, too much, as though another kick to my stomach.
it's late, but i think i can write something now. and mark some essays. and point myself towards tonight, my bed, and a nice long sleep.
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